Skip to main content

Mob Wives

                           

This is a guest post from The Urban Blabbermouth. Comments are welcome.

~
Where are the female Mafia bosses? There are female police commissioners, female sheriffs, female FBI agents but no female Mafia bosses.

I imagine that most women would not want this job, but I guarantee that there are a few criminal-minded sociopathic women out there with ambitions for the job. The ironic thing is that the female Mafiosi would still confront the same equality problems that all women face. It is well established that a woman must have far better skills and be more accomplished than her male colleagues to succeed in male dominated jobs. A female Mafioso criminal mastermind would have to be smarter, meaner, wickeder, and bloodthirstier than her colleagues. Surely, such women already exist but we just have not yet heard of them.

It may well be that she is so clever that she has not yet been noticed by the police. After all, one of the skills of a criminal mastermind is to avoid getting caught and sent to prison. So the police do not know that she exists and that she is out there running the Mafia. Maybe she has to hide her identity from her male Mafiosi underlings. Let's face it, macho Mafiosi do not think kindly of taking orders from a woman. The male Mafiosi probably see her all the time and talk to her all time but have no idea that she is their boss.

If the police experts, not to mention her own Mafiosi underlings, do not recognize her, then we, the public, would be clueless. After all, we do rely on the police for this sort of thing. This female Mafioso could be a well known person, perhaps a person we would often see on TV, but none of us would know her true identity. Nothing like hiding in plain sight.

Constantly referring to the female mafioso boss as the female this or the female that, is awkward. We need a proper title to match. It is easy to use "The Godmother" instead of “The Godfather” but what is the female equivalent of “The Don”? Possibly, “The Donna”? Not bad, certainly feminized. How about the more regal, “Madonna”?

Just a minute, isn't there an Italian woman from New York City who already uses that name? Do you suppose...

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

A Subway Journey Home

by The Urban Blabbermouth. Comments are welcome! ~ There is a ritual to theNew York City subway system. Once there, you lose your humanity.  You are transformed into a savage, brutal and selfish automaton.  Savage in that you push and shove other riders out of your way to get into the subway car.  Brutal in that you never excuse yourself for any atrocities that you commit to get in the subway car.  Selfish in that you never give up your seat to anyone, no matter how crippled or old or pregnant they are.  Automaton in that you never look at any one else as a human being.

Now there are certain strategies that you can employ to be a successful subway rider.  You can stand by the door and obstruct the way just to be selfish and ornery.  That strategy is designed to increase your standing with your fellow passengers by impressing them with how vicious you can be pushing back at people trying to push into the car.  Whenever I see this strategy employed, I immediately piggy back on it.  I move …

Im gonna git u Sukkah

by The Urban Blabbermouth [who may or may not be shown in the photo above... - v-E] ~ True story. I am walking to my car and I notice a couple of Jewish fellows, twenty somethings, with the bouquets of what looks like bamboo or palm. I know they are Jewish for they look Hasidic. They are wearing long black jackets, wide brim black fedora hats, and have curly sideburns. In truth, I classify all Jewish who dress like this as Hasidic although they may identify themselves differently. They are standing near the corner canvassing passersby.

Encyclopedia Brown Bear

by The Urban Blabbermouth
~
At an age when other children decide to set up lemonade stands, Baby Bear decided to start a detective agency. His decision resulted from his experience in the Goldilocks home invasion. If you don't know this well-publicized crime case, Google Goldilocks and the Three Bears. Baby Bear wanted to become a policeman to help the other denizens of the Forest with their troubles and to maintain justice for all. Alas, the police did not accept children as applicants.

Baby Bear ran to his community library and borrowed the renowned guide, The Hardy Boys' Detective Handbook. Baby Bear spent the next twenty days, the library's lending period, studying the text. He chose the business name of "Encyclopedia Brown Bear Detective Agency" after his hero, Leroy "Encyclopedia” Brown. Baby Bear's dad hung the business sign across the garage door and opened a folding card table and four chairs in the entrance below.

On the first day, the Big Bad Wolf…