Wednesday, January 29, 2014

Motherly advice from a Father


By The Urban Blabbermouth

One of the crucial and most embarrassing conversations to have with your daughter is to tell her about boyfriends.  One has to be sure to give her advice, otherwise she will learn on her own and make some pretty stupid mistakes.  This conversation is necessarily short as men are notoriously poor at giving advice to women and father-to-daughter advice fares no better.  But do be careful.  Boundaries must be maintained so as not to intrude too much into her privacy or worse, to show her how you were a cad in your years as a boyfriend.

So here it is: a daughter should have three boyfriends at all times.
  • Boyfriend No. 1 is for sociability.  This is the guy you hang out with.  He is the one who you talk to, who takes you shopping and is your best friend.
  • Boyfriend No. 2 is the wallet.  He is the one to call when you are spending big bucks on trips or expensive purchases.
  • Boyfriend No. 3 is for the bedroom.  This is self explanatory.  Invoke boundary rules and tell her to call her mom.
Advise her that most guys only fit one trait, hence the three-boyfriend rule and it is extremely rare to find all three traits in one man.  If she finds two of the three traits in one man, then marry him.  If she gets lucky and find all three traits in one man, then get on her knees every day and thank God for His extreme kindness.

There are other traits such as a Fixer to make lots of repairs around the house but don’t bother to look for those.  That is what her brother is for, call him.

Nuf said.


The Urban Blabbermouth said...

Saw an on-line dating stat: men with high incomes get more interest from women regardless of their looks. The Wallet BF wins!

I should write a post on, "My Trophy Millionaire Husband." hahaha

Gisele Bechauf said...

Good advise!
I always said women should marry a gay man and a straight man. Gay is for shopping and hanging with, and the other for the bedroom lol
So this was close ;)

Anonymous said...

Yeah, great advice but you left out one point. Tell your daughter to never marry a man who has never lived on his own.

A man who has lived on his own, away from his mother, will learn to cook, clean, and do laundry and your daughter will not have to teach him this.