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My Training Bra

by The Urban Blabbermouth
I still remember my first struggles with the clasp of a bra.  It is a rite of passage for young men just learning about relationships and women to struggle to open a bra.   Bras, in general, are like chastity belts for the breasts. They have a special lock, the clasp, and of course, are ridiculously difficult to open.

On the  eventful day, things started out normally enough with my girlfriend.  Let's call her by another name, Beverly, to protect her virtue (probably long gone by now).  Beverly liked to wear turtleneck sweaters.  You know how turtleneck sweaters just show off the female form.  Well, I got to noticing her soft round breasts, which lead to me taking liberties and having a wonderful squeeze.  Beverly's response to this was, "Did you enjoy yourself?"  Duh!!  Anyway, somehow I ended up trying to unclasp her bra.

Not so simple.  The clasps that close a bra are designed to frustrate us. Perhaps it is women's way of testing us. If you can open this mechanism, then you are manly, virile, and worthy of its contents. Yes, bra clasps are a conspiracy led by women. It’s not like Beverly needed to wear a bra.  She only had her breasts for a few years and they were perky enough to easily stand up on their own. Nope, she wore a bra to test me. 

It was a mean test.  First of  all, before this, I had no exposure to bra clasps. To state the obvious, I do not wear one so bras' clasps are quite foreign to me. My closest experience is the zippers on my pants and zippers are quite easy to operate.  Beverly, on the other hand, had daily practice with bra clasps while dressing.  She was an expert and she was using this knowledge against me.

The test, part one,  was how to get to her bra's clasps. Bra clasps are in the most impossible position, in back.  How am I supposed to get at them when Beverly is sitting and the chair is in the way blocking access.  Later I learned that there are front clasp bras.  I love the front clasp. So easy, and it’s like opening a book to your favorite page. So, Beverly leans forward and I have access.  I have passed.  Well, not yet.

Part two of her test was the most difficult of all, to actually open the clasps. The bra clasp is not really one clasp. It at least three clasps that must be disengaged one at a time. Sometimes, there are four, five or six clasps to be worked on.  Some men become masters of the bra clasp. They can just pass their hand over the clasp and it pops open. They are really Magicians in disguise.

Now that I remembering this, I have great pity for me, struggling to get the three clasps open.  Thank you Beverly for not wearing one of those bras with four, five or six clasps.  I did get these clasps open and Beverly and I did manage to get on with all the fumbling that goes along with this kind of event.

From that time forward, Beverly was very kind to me.  She wore a front clasp bra.  Don’t be surprised by that. Once you have proven yourself manly with the chastity bra and all those clasps, you can get special privileges from the young lady. To be honest, Beverly could have made it easier in the first place by not wearing a bra.  Is that too much to ask? 

Today, young men are lucky.  They are blessed with a bra training academy that we all know as Victoria’s Secret. Young men can go there, see all types of bras and can practice on them. Victoria’s Secret will also provide you with an instructor in the guise of a sales lady.  Victoria's Secret is not free.  You are required to buy your practice bras from them.  Just be sure that you are not caught wearing the bras when you are home practicing on the clasps.


Gisele Bechauf said…
If bra clasps were too easy they would come undone all the time... then where would a damsel be if her breasts got loose when she least expected it?
Lauren said…
Bras are not made to boost male ego. It does not matter if you, or other males, find them difficult to open because they are not made to affirm the male gender. Women do not wear bras to substantiate the "rite of passage" into manhood. Moreover, men do not become men by subjugating the female gender through supposing that women wear bras to offer them an opportunity to prove themselves. Please do not further society's determination that anything female related must, at its core, revolve around men.

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