Sunday, January 31, 2016

Striking In Pink

                  
by The Urban Blabbermouth
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At his daily news conference, Grand City's Police Chief, George Trueblueblood, mentioned that his patrol officers reported that they have not seen any prostitutes on the streets for the past week. 

When questioned by reporters, the Chief commented, "There are rumors about a dispute between the women and their pimps.  The Vice Squad is looking into it. This is a good trend and I hope it continues. Yes, it looks like the Ladies of the Evening have gone on strike and have stayed home."

I visited a local bar with a reputation as a meeting place for men and women.  I interviewed some of the men there and coincidentally, they were all named John. 

Said one John, "I just wanted to have a little fun.  I don't want them to strike."
 

Said another John, "What are we suppose to do?  Go home to our wives?"
 

Since none of the wives were present, I could not determine if they appreciated the increased attention from their husbands.

This reporter was confronted by two women in slinky pink dresses with over- exposed cleavages.  The first identified herself as Lady Holly and apologized for intruding.  She claimed to be a Working Girl and wanted to express their position, "We are on strike to improve our working conditions.  We want a better share of the money.  We do all the work and they, our pimps, get all the profits."

Her companion stated, "We are also looking for some other improvements too.  We are demanding softer mattresses.   In this business, we take quite a pounding and a softer mattress is a must." 

She continued, "We want some physical training too.  If we improve our skills, we can offer more services and charge more.  Every one benefits.  We want some acting lessons.  We can't just lie there and let things happen. Our customers like it when we participate.  We have to fake it to please our customers.  Its not easy to fake it time after time, hour after hour."

Added the first, "That’'s right.  We want uniforms too.  The way young girls dress now, It’s hard to tell who is a working girl.  A uniform will tell our customers who we are.  Give us a professional look."


None of the pimps present would comment on the ladies' demands.