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Death and Taxes

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Just in time for April 15th, I remembered the saying, there is no escaping death and taxes. Then this itty bitty thing popped into my head.

I am prepping lunch in my kitchen when there's loud knocking at my front door. I open the door and a man in a white shirt and gray suit is nailing paper to the door jamb. Who are you I say. IRS he says. What do you want I say. A levy for unpaid estate taxes he says. But I am not dead I say. Doesn't matter he says. Can we talk it over I say. Nothing to discuss he says. Who is your supervisor I say. She can't help you he says. It's not right I say. Walking Dead is still dead and must pay up he says. My stomach rumbles. I whack his gray hat off and eat his brains.


When I wrote that this story just popped into my mind, it is literally true. At the time, I was watching a news story that, at this late date, 40% of Americans (not me) have not yet filed their tax returns. So five minutes after the show on filing, this story was finished in my word processor.

Now I am ruminating on Death and Taxes for the last few days. Who came up with it? Google tells me it was Christopher Bullock in a play, The Cobbler of Preston, in 1716. I can't believe that. Death and taxes have been around humanity since day one. Surely someone has said this rather pithy phrase long before. Christopher Bullock is probably the earliest provable case we can find. One day, anthropologist will find that a caveman wrote it on a wall someplace.

I also add that Ben Franklin and Mark Twain wrote the phrase at some time. So now you can add me to that illustrious list.


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